Everything in Animal Crossing: New Leaf wants to kill you

By Maxwell Coviello, from Pixelitis

By now I’m sure you’ve heard of this thing called Animal Crossing: New Leaf, which may or may not be some Illuminati conspiracy to get us all addicted to the same game before “they” pull the switch and turns us all into The Last Of Us-esque zombies. You may have also read my review, which paints the game in a very positive and innocuous light.

Two weeks later, I see I was wrong. Not because New Leaf is a bad game—oh how wrong you are, friend—it’s amazing. The thing is, much like Australia, everything in this game wants to kill you.
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Every 7 Seconds

The urge to include any less than savoury images must have been bigger than a pair of Double Ds

It’s like 24 only if Jack Bower were stroking a constant semi.

Best of Youtube Comedy Week

What do you get when you mix a bunch of sardonic sketches, sexually frustrated music videos and more motion graphics than a J. J. Abrams movie? The most comprehensive network of online humour categorically designed to highlight make you feel ok about all your insecurities. Yes, the Youtube Comedy Week has come and gone. Like an angry Chris Brown in a bumpy limo ride, YCW was a little hit and miss. If the comments on the daily rundown are to be believed (and who doesn’t form their opinions and morals based on a youtube comments section), the entire week has been a shit attempt at telling people youtube has been around for 8 years but still has the average joe’s best interest at heart using average joe’s which (through talent or ownership or a camera) have reached arguably the least-threatening form of celebrity status available. I look at it for what it really is, the world’s best attempt at making spitting in people’s faces culturally acceptable. Here’s the best of Youtube Comedy Week.

Guitar Warfare

An awesome collaboration between Freddie “FreddieW” Wong and Thomas “TomSka” Ridgewell fused with all the rocky coolness and no-nonsense bloodlust of Scott Pilgrim.

Youtube in Medieval Times

One of just a couple ‘Youtube through the ages’ videos (Check out Above Average‘s and The Gregory Brothers videos, dems some good watching). This video shows between beheadings and the bubonic plague, life wasn’t all that hard in the 13th century.

The Six

This is you.

College Humor’s The Six series properly analyzes your life and tells YOU how YOU lived with incredible accYOUracy.

The 8 Most Irresponsible Drinkers in Videogame History

BY ANDREW BRIDGMAN, FROM DORKLY
There are a lot of things you should never do drunk – drive, text, walk, pretty much anything except “fall asleep and hope you wake up with a low-level headache.” The list gets even longer when you’re a videogame character, who should probably be saving the world or preparing for battle instead of trying to re-enact the SHOTS video. But that never stopped some virtual characters from takin’ a few swigs too many at some inappropriate times. These are the 8 most irresponsible drinkers in videogame history.

8. Commander Shepard (Mass Effect 2)

While he’s supposedly in a race against time to recruit a team to save the universe from the Reaper menace, Commander Shepard can sidle up to a bar and ask for a few drinks. And if he keeps asking for drinks, eventually the turian bartender will offer to make a special krogan drink for him, since Shepard’s pretty sure he can handle it (having already come back from the dead once this game, odds are they can resurrect his liver once more, right?). It’s a drink that’s so strong that it’s practically radioactive (which usually doesn’t matter for krogans, given the whole “our entire race is dying out anyway” thing). If Shepard takes the drink, he instantly passes out and wakes up on a bathroom floor. Ignoring the nasty questions of how exactly he ended up there, it feels like maybe Shepard should get back to trying to stop those deep space-dwelling civilization-eaters instead of knocking back space-margaritas and passing out in front of urinals.
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