Gather around children and let me tell tales of a time long ago. Tales of a magical era when you were never more than 30 minutes away from having a pizza delivered to you regardless of state of mind or location. You could command birds of an unexplained exasperated disposition to hurtle themselves into livestock-inhabited construction sites. A time when the most trusted encyclopaedia ever, was written by people no more intelligent than you or I. It was a time of miracles, it was the dawn of the 21st century.
There are a lot of ways in which the present day is the hardest time to be alive in history. On the other hand – Siri. 20 years ago, if you heard the word “Siri”, you’d think there was a South African apologizing somewhere. Sure an increasing population and the demands of urbanisation are outweighing the natural resources we have to sustain them, plus we’ve been in this global recession for around 3000 years now but we also live in a world where the Nintendo Wii exists. It can’t be all bad.
So even though people enjoy complaining about the age we live in, “people are getting stupider”, “there are too many distractions in society”, “there’s not enough bacon in my baconator”, etc. here’s a list of awesome things that the (1st) world enjoy relentlessly, starting with…
HD is beautiful and you won’t go back
HD. Allowing a man to view naked women with such clarity, he’ll no longer need to make love to his wife. The pleasure of watching anything in high definition is akin to having your significant other enact your favourite fantasy. It’s unbelievable at first, and even after you melt into it you never want it to end (not to mention you can’t believe you’re doing it in the middle of the day). If you a fan of comfortable viewing experiences the 21st century is a pretty sweet time to be around; between television, online videos, movies and video games, the fidelity of detail is astounding. And computers mouses come without wires now. How amazing is that?
The level of video quality it is currently possible to render is so great, the average computer monitor can’t even truly display it all (pull your finger out Phillips). Technology is at a level so photographically advanced, reality looks dim by comparison. God rest her soul but every time you turn on Fashion Police you could tell if Joan Rivers was wearing underwear or not. If that doesn’t scream ‘I live in the 21st century’, I don’t know what does.
And HD quality doesn’t just make the present exciting but the future as well. Even though perhaps unthinkable, video quality will only continue to improve. With terms like “High Frame Rate”, “16:9 Aspect Ratio” and “Directed by James Cameron” flying around, you could easily think technology has improved tenfold every time you check out Digital Spy. Jargon understood only by Christopher Nolan and 5 & a half other people roughly translates to “really freakin’ good video”, and that’s all we need to know. Words like Blu-Ray, 60fps, IMAX, 1080p and 4K are more likely members of the world’s first all cyborg boyband anyway.
Click to find out what else us first worldies shouldn’t scoff about